Escaped From a Crocodile's Bite, But Accidentally Entered Tiger's Mouth

Assalamualaikum and good evening

First of all, I must keep reminding myself, I must accept the written fate of my life.

“Allah does not burden a soul with more than it can bear.”(Quran 2: 286)


"Do men think that they will be left alone on saying 'We believe', and that they will not be tested? We did test those before them, and Allah will certainly know those who are true 
from those who are false."(Quran 29:2-3)


Okay, I think with these verses, words of Allah, taken from the holy al-Quran will help me to calm down and relax.

I already have a new job. Perda, Pulau Pinang is the place where me and my friend, Badri Shaharudin went for an interview with a company. We found the job in a local newspaper and quickly called the person in the advertisement. When we arrived, we were interviewed by the clerk, a young beautiful woman who soothed our heart at that moment. We choose the position that we want, 'CUSTOMER SERVICE' as we want to evade any works that require us to get sales. Although the salary is rm500 per month, we can get extra income for every water filter that we service. Yes, it is a water treatment/filter company. Plus, the work is only within office hours, that is, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

We went for training for few days, knowing the product itself and the history of the company. We came early to the office and we cannot stop ourselves from becoming too excited to start the job. On 6th of June we came to the office like usual but there was no one there. Then we got a call from our boss. We were asked to go for an outstation for a week, only. Allowance will be provided, she said. So, we head back to Kulim, to pack our belongings, and wait for them to fetch us. We waited at home from the afternoon until night for them. At 10 p.m., they came. On our journey to Slim River we had a chat, all five of us. Badri, another boy who is the same age with us, a male supervisor, and his wife. Surprisingly, our job is not 'customer service' but DIRECT SELLING AGENT instead.

So here we are, trapped with problems...in Tanjung Malim, not Slim River. WITH NO ALLOWANCE !!!
Only advance money are available. With the basic of RM500...If I keep asking for advance, how much my salary will be later on?I have to pay for hotel about RM11 per day, and this outstation last for around 11 days, which means RM110, and I eat average of RM10 per day. The best part is, in my account there's RM3 left, as I already withdraw RM90 from it.I only got one sale for now, selling one unit of water filter and I get RM20 only
RM20 !!!
this coming Friday, 24th of June 2011 I'll go back to Kulim and on 20th of June I'll have to go for an outstation again until 30th of June, where advance money is on the line.


Let me show some calculation:

RM500 (basic) + RM20 (commission) = RM520
Hotel for this out station (10 days) = RM110
Advance (not sure) = RM50
Next outsation = RM110 + RM 110 (hotel and food for 10 days)

RM520 - RM110 - RM50 - RM220 = RM140

SERIOUSLY I NEED MORE SALES....if I quit I won't get any money...
I DON'T LIKE this selling thingy AT ALL
I need to pay RM600 for my PS3 and RM600 for my mom
And I don't know if I have the money
My wifi bill also need to be payed this month

I HAVE BEEN CHEATED BY MY BOSS...AND THE WORKERS THERE...I DID ASKED MY BOSS ABOUT THIS JOB, AND SHE SAID THERE WILL BE NO SALES, JUST SERVICE THE  CUSTOMERS' WATER FILTER AND WILL BE GIVEN ALLOWANCE...NOT TO FORGET THE WORKERS THERE, WHO COVERED THE BOSS' EVIL ACT

I really wish this nightmare will end soon...I can't wait to go to July, where I'll quit this freaking job.
Wonder if I can go to the Labour Department Peninsular Malaysia to complaint about my case...

I don't like to knock people's door to promote this water filter although this product has the quality to win my heart...I had to bring the filter all along the apartment, quarters, low cost house, under the raging sun blaze. THIS SUCKS A LOT !!!

You're the best boss I ever known !!! Okay, I'm lying...

I want to cry but it's too late to do that..I have to face it anyway..T_T
I miss my parents, family, friends
home, guitar, my pillow, motorcycle

I MISS KULIM

MEdSI

Assalamualaikum and good morning

This entry would be a little informative rather than previous entries I think. And it is better for me to share with you guys before my stared to lose the information that you guys may need. I hope that you guys already know what MEdSI stands for. If not, here we go:

M  : Malaysian
Ed : Education
S   : Selection
I    : Inventory

So, it is a selection process for students from Matriculation College, STPM students, Foundation leavers and Diploma holders to enter degree in education, whether it is TESL (Teaching English as Secondary Language) like me, mathematics, science, sport, language and many more.

The first task would be the written test. It is a test to evaluate the attitude of the future teachers, and to select some candidates to the next stage, which is the interview. When you check through the official web page of Malaysian Ministry Of Higher Education (MOHE), and you are selected for the interview, that means you passed the written test and you must get ready for the interview. There are also few things you need to check to face the interview:

1. Hairstyle
2. Dressing code
3. General knowledge regarding Malaysian education, current and few big things in the past
4. Few big names in MOHE, Ministry of Education (MOE) and the government itself
5. Teaching demonstration (you'll need to study)
6. Documents that are related to the interview

Okay now, let's go straight to the main point...now I will try to memorize back my conversation with the interviewers.

Me : Zulfahmi Mohamed
Interviewer 1 : Malay man
Interviewer 2 : Chinese man
Interviewer 3 : Malay woman

Me  : (Knocked the door)...Assalamualaikum and good morning...(give my file, full of certificates to the interviewers)

IV 3 : We'll have to test your eyes first to detect your colour blindness

Me  : ...(Gave the answers)

IV 2 : You may sit

Me  : Thank you

IV 1 : Now Zulfahmi, can you please introduce yourself

Me  : My name is Zulfahmi...

IV 1 : Can you speak louder?

Me  : My name is Zulfahmi Bin Mohamed. I was born in Bukit Mertajam 'at' (damn, I was so nervous at that time) 22nd of July 1992. Before this I lived in Serdang, Selangor and then I moved to Kulim, Kedah.

IV 1 : How about your co-curriculum or your contribution for your schools as a student?

Me  : I represented my school for rugby competition in Northern Zone. I also participated in Silat, which is in sparring competition. I also became a commander in the scout troop in national Jamboree. Last but not least, I also act in a drama team.

IV 1 : Can you please tell me, why do you like to be a teacher?

Me : I would like to be a teacher because I believe that I can understand the students better. I don't want to punish them, but I want to understand them and hear their problems...I want the students to believe that English is not as hard as they think.

IV 2 : You know that the government send new teachers in Sabah and Sarawak. Would you like to go there if they ask you to do so?

Me  : Since the government announced that teachers who were sent to Sabah and Sarawak will get allowance, so I think I will go there.

IV 2 : Lets say that they will not give any allowance. Would you still going there?

Me  : (Laughed and smiled).....I'm still going there because it is my duty.

IV 1 : Would you like to demonstrate your teaching method to us?

Me  : Sure! (started to use the marker pen and whiteboard)

IV 1 : Nowadays, many of the students cannot speak in English. Can you tell us why?

Me  : I believe that they're lack of self esteem in using English as daily conversation. Besides, they don't use English frequently and some of them even talk with their teachers in Bahasa Malaysia.

IV 1 : In order to increase the standard of English for students, what would you like to do? Since the students in rural areas cannot master English that well.

Me  : I will teach them English, not only in formal way, but informal too. Such as listening to music, watching films, and many more.

IV 1 : I think that's all, thank you.

Me  : (Took back the file from the third interviewer and shake hands with the male interviews)


Now this is the best part when I shook my hand with them....>.<

IV 1 : Zulfahmi, you're the best !
Me   : (Blushing)...thanks

I think that's all, and please pray for me so that I can get TESL for my degree. The result should be at the end of July. Can't wait....>.<
If I get TESL for my degree, that means I've passed the interview...=)

P.S : I'm not sure whether it is applicable only in my place for interview or not, but it seems like the 3rd interviewer only checked the file for certificates AND the written conversation is not the exact words and sentence structures that I used because I cannot remember well. But, the points are still there.

I still want to be a teacher, so what's your problem?

She Who Has The Magic And Cursed Me With Her Charm

Assalamualaikum and good morning

The title shows it all. It is about a woman. Yet again, not them, not the other girls but only her. Why her and not the others? It is simply because she's still staying here right in my heart for a long time rather than those women that broke my heart.

She doesn't have to jinx me with her witch pot

So, what's so special about her? She's still a Malay, Muslim like many of the other girls in my university, school, work place, shopping complex and other places. Why she can still staying in my heart for 4 years and I am willingly wait her her for 5-6 more years?

The first answer would be because of her faith in Islam

That's the first thing that crossed to my mind when talking about girls we should marry with. That's why I'm highlighting this thing, because to me, and the other Muslims, it is important. I do believe that her faith and believe in Islam is more than the other girls that I met before. By looking at her appearance, you would know it by simply looking at her way of dressing:

Hand socks that ensures the aurah (restricted body areas for muslims) to be covered

Socks that covers the feet which is an aurah area

And last but not least, a long and big scarf. Not only to cover the hair, but also the shoulders and chest

(This is not her, it is a dummy for God sake..hahaha)

I know that many of you or my other friends would say that I'm not suitable to have this kind of woman to be my wife. Well, I believe that everyone in Earth would want perfectness in their life. That's it, everyone. No matter how bad are your attitude (like me), no matter how ugly your face are (also like me), how stupid are you with your brain (like me too), you're still hoping for the perfectness, and the best in our life.

The other factors that made her my choice, for such a long time is, she somehow can sooth my heart through her words (although the words are in text forms, and not through verbal). She's the only that can make me feel like my chest is tightening, and I can feel there's an invisible hand squeezing my heart when she made me frustrated. The worst time was when I knew that she was in love with one guy and the guy also responded with the same feeling, I felt in sick for almost a week. I have some sort of fever on each night on that week. Amazingly it happened only during nights and for a few months, I felt so downed to the earth. That's when I started to smoke that I believed can help me out of the problem.

I know we would've been compared like heaven and earth because I am not a very good guy to make her as my wife. I know maybe it is too early to discuss this issue. But I would like if she know that I am damn serious about her. She already knew that I'm in love with her, four years ago, but she's still didn't gave me any rigid answer and that's why I have to keep waiting for an answer, from her, an answer that I am really longing for until this very second. I already kept this feeling deep in my heart and it is hard to pull it out. It is already to turn back. I must continue what I have started.

I already built a mountain of hope and in a process of climbing it....I hope she won't kick me off when I reached the peak or when I was still climbing it

I know that she is too clever to be with me, with an extremely good result in SPM (High School Public Examination) and she's now studying medic abroad. While I got a C+ for chemistry and I'm now studying in the art stream, I also realized that I too am stupid to be compared with her. But I am now pursuing my degree in TESL, degree in education. I can be teacher, like her father, who was retired. And the fun fact is, my parents knew her parents and vice versa, but her parents didn't know about us. Only my mum knows but I didn't gave her the details. Ah, before I forget, her hometown is in Kulim, Kedah. I mean, her grandparents and stuffs. So she's like me, all my relatives and grandparents are in Kulim. That's mean I won't have any problem regarding celebrating Eid evey year because we are gonna go to the same place. =P
Rather than couples who are having problems in celebrating Eid, as their hometowns are not the same. One of them is at the northern region of Malaysia and the other one is at southern region. That will bring them headache.

So, no matter how many girls that I'll meet later or the girls that I've already met, they will only make me remember her more. Why? When I'm trying to 'move-on', if I can win their heart, somehow I still remembered her. And I can't focus with my new relationship. Or even worser, when I like someone than I was disappointed by them, then I think of her again and again. I knew those girls will be out of her league but somehow I like them. Their presence will only make my feelings stronger towards her.

In my journey to wait for her, I must change myself to be a better man as in the holy Quran says, "Good women are meant to be with good men". But I must bare in my mind that I am changing for Allah, for my family, future children and for her. I also must work hard in order to save my money, for her, in the future.

We share the same sky, the same sun. I hope wherever she is right now, studying in her room, in the lecture hall or whatsoever, she will keep me in her heart and mind. Because I already told her that I am really serious with her and I know she's still acknowledge it until now. I really hope she will accept me although I am not as good as she is, and I am not a perfect man for her. But I really want her to be my future wife. =')

To settle down and get married at the age of 24 or 25, that's my goal. I don't want to build huge age gaps between me and my children. And perhaps, my wife would be her. Because I believe she can be a good mother for my children. I love her with all my heart.

W, I really love you, I really do. And I want to be with you. It's you who I chose long time ago. Sorry if I ever made you feel uneasy in your life. You are the only one who can let my guard down.

I'm Fired !!!

Assalamulaikum and good morning

It has been a while, yet again. This time I managed to find some time to write for a new entry.
Because....
I WAS FIRED
Yeah, indeed.

Oh yeah...I can feel the laser beam right through my heart !

I was working like hell during last month. I didn't have enough time for blogging and as the result, I can feel the weights on my fingers when typing this entry. =.=

I admit that I came late to work, I ditched some hours of work, but then if I got caught, that's just me with the supervisor. On last Friday, 20th of May, I received an Short Message Service (SMS) from my supervisor that it is my last day already. Simply because they said that my time didn't match with theirs. I just asked my supervisor and boss to get back earlier from 21st-23rd of May because I want to help my father in the stall, which sells Bakso. The roadshow for that week requires me to work from 11 a.m. until 10 p.m. and I ask them if I ever get the chance to finish my work at 6 p.m. They said that they will discuss about it later on. Surprisingly, the result is, when I get back from work, I received the SMS. =.=

At first, I can't accept the fact that I've been fired. Well, I got to pay my mom RM600 because I borrowed her money and I have to pay RM1200 for the PS3 because I already deposited RM300 for it...

GREAT !!!
The salary that I will received is just around RM700 I think and where can I find the remaining money for my mom and PS3?

Now I already accept that I'm jobless and I need to find a new job. I must believe in faith and Allah S.W.T will always beside me to help me out in life, although truth hurts a lot. Maybe He destroys my plan and maybe He wants to replace it with a better one. Who knows right?

The things that I want to focus right now are:
1. The Malaysian Education Inventory Selection (MEdSI) interview on this coming 29th of May (This is regarding my future because I want to be a teacher)

2. How to pay RM1200 to the game shop (Maybe I ask my brother for some money)

3. To settle down RM600 for my mother (I don't want her to be in a deep problem regarding money)

May Allah S.W.T helps me dealing with these problems, and at the same time I must help myself out of these problems.

P.S : No more purple shirt, 6 days a week. Goodbye fellow friends

Bees Are Always Busy, So Do I

 Assalamualaikum and good morning

I feel my life as a robot right now...haha...Oh ya, I forgot, first of all thanks for those are still open my blog just to read stupid stuffs that I put in here. And sorry that I am too busy working right now...I have to work from morning until evening as a sales promoter and at the evening-night I helped my father out at the Bakso stall. I make drinks for the customer. Insya-Allah I'll try my best to put some pictures in this blog later on.

 A cute bee that I think doesn't busy at all...xD

Many people asked me why I am so serious when it comes to money? >.< ....it is simple, I want to build my own empire of business and have lots of money in the bank for my family later on. It is for the sake of my parents, wife (in future) and kids (also in the future)...Plus, my friends said that we can later on start to finance easily after we get a job, with the degree in our hands.

For me, if we had the chance to save some money before we finished our degree would it be nice? You can have lots of money after graduating while others are about to start financing at that time. My target, I will have RM30k++ if I can save around RM5k for each two semesters in my degree. I believe It can be achieve if I put more discipline in handling my money. And that's why I'm thinking about quitting smoke... I want to save more money. I just don't care about my own health actually. I need cigarette whenever I feel tensed, hanging out with friends, after eating, bored, and many more. But it sure costs me and I can't bare it anymore.

For these 4-5 months there are few targets that I want to achieve, that's why I'm busy working. In next few 4 months, insya-Allah I will get RM4k that I need. RM2k is for my savings, that would be a total of RM11k if I count it all, and another RM2k to buy the lovely Sony PlayStation 3. =D

I'm sure spending my money on consoles like this is far more better than buying new cell phones. Cell phones evolves fast. If you buy a new cell phone today, a month later you won't surprise if there's a new model, which has a stylish design, cheaper, the specifications are better than yours, and theworst part is, when you want to sell the existing cell phone, the price dropped tremendously. That's why I choose to buy PlayStation 3 than a new cell phone.

Just take a look at Allah's beautiful creation...I really wish I can get a huge 'empire' like this one day

For the money that I've been saving since last year, if it reaches RM20k, the dividend that I can get if I put into the bank, I will get around RM2k, well that's enough for an engagement. >.<. I think about getting engage in the age of 23 or 24. That should be just fine. I don't know why, but I keep on thinking about the future that awaits.

Owh my, I talk too much about money...-.-

Yeah and one more thing, when thinking about the girl that I like since I was in high school, makes me more energetic to work harder in order to make more money. Although I had two accidents while I was riding my motorcycle to work due to the slippery road, I stood up and ignored all the pain that I had to suffer. It is all because of her. I won't mind to save my money if it's not for her.

And for all more hardship that I have to face now, I know that God will repay it with happiness someday.
One of His name is Al-Muqsit, means The Just...I really believe He would give me the happiness that I need in the future...=')

The Regret Will Never End...

Assalamualaikum…

The date, 5th of April 2011. This is the birthday of the man that I love, Zakaria Bin Duramin, who was born on the 5th of April, 1947. It is a written-fate that he used to be my neighbor, back when my family was in the quarters of agricultural department in Serdang, Selangor. His wife, Mama (Rozlena Binti Ab Latif) would nurse me in her house, a place where I could feel the warmth of love and care, in the morning chill of the quarters. Sun may lit the ground by it's blazing sunshine in the morning, that will eventually arise everybody's life in the quarters. We lived like we were in some kind of village back then.

In the very house, I spend lots of time with them. Baba always entertained me with his jokes, and most of the weekends he will ask my parents' permission  to bring me out along together with Mama and his daughters, Kakak Rin (Ezrin Asyiqin) and Kakak Na (Ezna Syaqira).

Unfortunately, I think in the late 90's, Baba was admitted to a hospital which I can't remember. And he was admitted into the ward, for several days. Both of his kidneys were damaged. Later on, he had to go for dialysis. At first, he needs to go for it once a week, then twice a week, and at the critical time, once every two or three days.

His condition was still like that. My family had to move to Kulim, Kedah in 2003. Of course it was a sad moment for me, to leave the lovable family as I spend time with them since I was a little baby. They used to change my diapers, bath me, pick my ears, fed with foods and love...I appreciate that...Thanks a lot...=')

Actually, if I don't leave the quarters, they will move to Sungai Buloh. This is because, Baba's service in the government sector has ended...He retired in 2003. Ever since I was apart from them, I'll visit them for about 2-3 times every year if I had the chance to do so.

Time flies around very fast, with the blink of an eye, 2009 arrived, a year of chaos to me, as I had to face lots of challenges in that particular year. But for Baba and family, it turned to be worse than before. Mama was positive, for having cancer, and Baba's condition was weaker than before.

2010, Mama was cleared out from cancer, but Baba turned out to use a stick to support himself...Baba started to have problems with his eye, cataract. Then his ears cannot hear the sounds from the surroundings properly, he cannot smell as good as before. To make it simple, it's like his senses are having trouble. Kakak Na and Kakak Rin told me that some of his friends in the hospital, who used to have dialysis process have passed away. It is a miracle, that Baba still hanging on, although he had gone through the dialysis process for more than a decade. They also said that Baba's friends cannot stand for the kidney failure disease like him. Baba has a strong soul and spirit, to continue on living. He knew that he will never win the battle, but still he was fighting against it...until the end of his life...

About two weeks before he passed away, I was given the opportunity to take care of him for a night at a hospital...Only then I knew how hard it is to deal with old folks. We need to have lots of patience of course. He sometimes doesn't remember about the past due to the Alzheimer. So, when I take care of him for a night, he doesn't remember few things about events happened an hour before. Plus, when I tried to help him, somehow he was in a deep pain. I was sad when I had done things that make him in a crucial pain, but somehow I must do it for the sake of his health...That really makes me sad...

One evening, Kakak Na called me and said that Baba was in a really critical condition...I was having an outing back then. When she told me, my eyes started to fill by droplets of water...My friends were there, in I think it was not cool to cry in front of public. Back in my hostel, I sleep, to forget the problems. When I woke up, I checked my cell phone, I received lots of phone calls and texts. Baba passed away...I was bursting into tears. I quickly perform my Maghrib prayer, and read Surah Yaasin for him...

I cannot go to his house because I have no transport at that particular time...So I need to wait for the next morning to go to his funeral. I tried to wake up as early as I can, I took a bus to KL Central, and then took a train to Sungai Buloh. But I just couldn't make it to his burial ceremony.

In other words...I didn't have the chance to take a look at his face for the last time...To kiss his forehead for the first and last time...But now I don't have the chance anymore...T_T

The tears that I've been shedding until now just won't bring him back...

My Life After The Foundation

Assalamualaikum and good morning~

Hmmm...Right now it's 4.50 a.m and I just start blogging...haha!!! See, I turned to be a nocturnal person after the foundation. I slept until afternoon (I don't need to care about classes to catch on), and started sleeping at dawn. Maybe yeah, I am an owl-to-be.....=D

I'm certainly not studying anything at night....

Few days after I arrived at Kulim, I thought to look myself for a vacancy as a replacement teacher at any schools in Kulim. So, first things first, I had to cut my hair...Yes, CUT MY LOVELY STRAIGHT LONG HAIR down to the earth..T_T... I really jealous of my old friend. He has a long hair because he is working, not studying like me. I had to sacrifice it for the sake of getting the position, but unluckily, I forgot that my SPM slip along together my friend from UiTM Puncak Alam, Wanud. Actually the slip is in a folder, which I brought to UiTM Puncak Alam and I carelessly drop it there, in his room...=P...So I asked him to post the slip to my hose, and I got the slip back!!! thank God!!!

 From a so called 'Korean' hair~

                                                                                            To a Shin Chan-ned hair?...=P

So, yesterday I just completed the documents for the application as a replacement teacher, this is because of the misplaced SPM slip ...=.="...I also asked for jobs as a backup if I didn't get the job as a teacher. I asked for a position in a factory, as a store person, but I think when the interview checked my SPM result, I think she would not accept me, because she noticed my result is average, and I will further my studies rather than hooking up with the factory all along my life. So now I'm back at my father's Bakso stall, to help him in making drinks to the customer. But lately, the business had become worse. The customers were not as many as they were, back in 2010. The stall is too quiet compared to couple of years ago.

I wanna be a millionaire so freakin' bad~

One more thing to be considered is my financial status. I just wanna start to save some money but I was burdened by a lot of debts. My motorcycle, Honda Ex5 had to be repaired a month ago and it cost RM500. I had to use the money that supposed to be use to pay my college fees, RM200. Then I borrowed RM350 from my mom, and I had to take back my PlayStation 2 from a shop. Last month I brought my PS2 to get serviced since it can't read DVD games like it used to. Well, my PS2 is almost 7 years old. It needs to be serviced so it can be used like before and I was charged RM130. So, the total debt is around RM 680. And I am unemployed yet...If I only work for my father, I will only get RM10-RM15 per day, 6 p.m-11 p.m. And I also must put aside some cash for the fuel and cigarettes. And after a brief calculation, I estimate I can only save RM50 per week. That means RM200 per month. I need to get a job that starts at the morning and ends at the afternoon/evening so I still can help my father out.

But despite of all my financial constrain, I really appreciate the value of friendship that I experienced even after the foundation. I met with some old friends,guys and girls from MRSM Langkawi. There are now studying in UniKL (Boss and Bod), UiTM Pulau Pinang (Kapten, Ayam, Arau, Conan). Not to forget some other friends in Pulau Pinang Matriculation College/Kolej Matrikulasi Pulau Pinang (KMPP). We had a good travel via motorcycle (convoy), drinking and eating together, and not to forget smoking together by sharing a packet of cigarette. We will gonna miss those moments we had together.

Here are some pictures for our mini reunion:

 From the left Aizat Akmal (Kapten/Helmet), Firdaus Ridzwan (Boss), Me and Hafiz (Ayam)

 Kapten is somehow laugh at Boss...haha

 Boss is looking forward about his future...I miss my hair..='(

 This is, the coolest pic...hehe

 Almost the same as the above~

 Stupid jokes were still delivered even on an escalator and Ayam cannot help himself from stop laughing...=D

Only now I noticed that we were all dressed in black...=.="

Can't wait to face the days that awaits me in the future~ and I hope I can get a job, so that I can have lots of money. Okay, it's already 6.30 a.m and time to sleep folks~

P.S - I really miss my old hair....